Yesterday marked two years since we sat in a waiting room at the Laguna Beach Mission Hospital’s emergency room waiting for the results of a CT scan that was ordered “just to rule it out”. Two years since the doctors came in and told us “there’s a tumor”. Two years since Amos had his first (of very many) ambulance rides on his way to CHOC for emergency brain surgery. Two years since we said goodbye as he went under anesthesia for the first time. Two years since we sat by his bedside wondering when he would wake and who we would find. Would it be Amos? Our sweet, smart, energetic, and talented little three year old? The short answer was “yes”. The long answer was “yes”.
For the first few weeks, though, he didn’t really wake up at all. Gradually, he could smile and raise a thumb. Over the weeks he began to return to us ever so slightly and little by little. It was the most painful and exciting thing that our hearts had ever known.
And now we see him. He’s our Amos, but he’s different. Older? yes. Stronger? definitely. He’s marked by the scars that have shaped him, the heaviness of what he doesn’t even know that he bears. He is willing and able to face each day with a smile. Sometimes with some grumps too. He is wise, kind, and he prays prayers like this one from the lunch table this past week,
“Dear Jesus, thank you that you know what death is like. And thank you for this food. Amen.”
He is a medical miracle in very real ways and we are forever grateful that the Lord has allowed him to remain with us. Some days are long and hard. Sometimes we wonder and we weep. And as much as we can, we rejoice in what the Lord has done and is doing in and through Amos.
These past two years have been the hardest imaginable but we have never been able to forget that the Lord is with us. His faithfulness endures through cancer, through paralysis, through feeding tubes, through radiation, chemotherapy, tracheostomies, eye surgeries, and sleep studies. The Lord has never allowed us to lose sight of His goodness and of his mighty hand of protection over Amos and our family. We are grateful. And still very stunned by all that has happened. Emotionally, spiritually, and physically we are working on recovering from the biggest trauma of our lives. It’s a slow crawl some days but more than anything I am grateful for the hope that we have in Christ and the love of his people that together carries us through.
Thank you for walking with us through these past two years. What an incredible gift to be loved, prayed for, and ministered to by so many different members of the body of Christ. Our prayer for Amos is that he would indeed grow to know the love of Jesus and the fellowship of the saints no matter what this world brings his way.
Thank you from the bottom of our hearts. And we sure do love this boy. He is a warrior, a survivor, and a precious blessing to our family. What a gift to get to see him grow.
Here’s a picture of Amos from almost exactly two years ago.
And here’s a picture of Amos from last month, carrying out his duties as a ring bearer for the wedding of a friend.